‘You don’t want to hear the phrase, ‘I’ll be right back,’ either. That’s code for ‘Go f—k yourself,’ according to a woman who used to fly for Northwest and taught me several terms specific to her profession.

‘You know how a plastic bottle of water gets all crinkly during a flight? Well, it happens to people, too, to our insides. That’s why we get all gassy.’

‘So what me and the other girls would sometimes do is fart while we walked up and down the aisle. No one could hear it on account of the engine noise, but, anyway, that’s what we called ‘crop dusting.’

- Just in time for the JetBlue chute incident, David Sedaris writes a personal history of air travel (via newyorker)

This explains so, so much.

(via markcoatney)

1. theantidote likes this
2. thewinterblues likes this
3. sergionavarrete reblogged this from iwasframed
4. jcwarner reblogged this from newsweek
5. afabulous likes this
6. cartwheels-somersaults reblogged this from newsweek
7. brasilpop likes this
8. jcwarner likes this
9. blaseblase likes this
10. cranberryflags likes this
11. twowheelsgoodfourwheelsbaaad likes this
12. sugarhighz likes this
13. theasphaltworld likes this
14. restlessruminations likes this
15. redheadedrachel likes this
16. marknoonan likes this
17. jessieisarobot reblogged this from newyorker
18. andresvillaveces reblogged this from newyorker
19. abeaille reblogged this from newyorker
20. lacumcerebrum reblogged this from newyorker
21. givingupthegun reblogged this from newyorker
22. dendroica likes this
23. nextstopthecircus likes this
24. vicster likes this
25. elleneichner likes this
26. absurdlakefront likes this
27. silas216 reblogged this from brooklynmutt
28. emchughes reblogged this from newyorker
29. just-susanna likes this
30. booklungs likes this
31. lelapin reblogged this from newsweek
32. boutofcontext likes this
33. rechercher likes this
34. nothing-elegant likes this
35. dopeamineripeaskarma reblogged this from newsweek
36. imsupersyd reblogged this from newsweek
37. imsupersyd likes this
38. spacedotdash likes this
39. ezanee likes this
40. c8lins likes this
41. ravenknifegrinder likes this
42. 1980plus7 likes this
43. stufftotelljillian reblogged this from newyorker
44. lukeandtjsmom likes this
45. jackhynes likes this
46. listenupfives likes this
47. mijamia reblogged this from newyorker
48. shenanniegans1001 likes this
49. jenyfly reblogged this from newyorker
50. sasquatchmedia likes this
51. Show more notesLoading...